Now, keep in mind...laughing is not a nice thing to do to people who have experienced pain....
I have never used one of these before:
(It's a roasting pan/oven thing, I think it is like a portable oven or something, but without the convection and top and bottom elements.)
Anyway, I had 2 huge hams to make, and thought it would be nice to roast them together. I was sending one to my parents, and one to my husband's work with him.
(we don't eat a lot of ham, mostly because it is ham, and I heard this horror story about what the ER rooms look like after Easter, and it freaked me out. Don't point out that I am giving it to my husband's employees and parents though. I mean, I wish them no harm, I just don't want gut death.)
So, I borrow the roaster oven from my dad. Then I realize I don't know how to use it.
I throw the 2 huge hams in, dump a little water on them, and call it good. Then, I notice it has a bottom part. I lift the top part of it out, and it looks like I need to put water in the bottom. I have no idea how much, or anything, so I call my mom she promptly hands the phone over to my dad.
Dad tells me to put about a cup of water in the bottom, so I pour 3 cups down there. (better safe, besides, it didn't look like much) I drop the top part of the roaster back in (with HEAVY HAMS), and the water gushes everywhere. fine, dad was right.
After spending 5 minutes cleaning that mess up, I was ready to go again. I pick up the heavy pan, and DROP it into the bottom.
Who? Who! Would have predicted, that as I leaned over the roaster to drop the heavy pans in, a certain braless in a light tshirt leaning over the counter, part of my body would be come pinched - yes BOTH OF THEM- between the pan and the roaster. That's right.
I'm better today, but it pretty much hurt all afternoon. See? This is why I don't cook.
64 comments:
Hillarious - thank you for sharing that - it makes me see that I am NOT alone in my life bloopers!! Not just you - LOL - I could definitely see me pulling that off also!
OUCH! I hope your okay!
(Thanks for the laugh though!)
OH MY WORD! I'm amazed at times things you get into. Thanks for the laugh.... and NOW, I really do get why you don't cook! Hope the "girls" are ok.
I love you. You're awesome.
Stay away from the grill.
Haha, sorry to laugh. I am so klutzy--I understand.
Awesome! It was like a holiday mammogram!
Anybody that would make me hams for dinner would own my heart...
I still looking for such bounty
wonderful hammy story
LOL! I just love your 'only you' stories. :)
hahaha!
i'm not a cook, too!
especially large meats like ham, i will not attepmt to because i know i will be disaster after.
i'm sorry, but i'm laughing my head off right now!!!
and THAT is why i don't cook. ;)
Uhm...ouch? And *snort*. And most definitely ouch again.
Aw, you had a hammy mammy. :)
Haha, I have never used one of those pans!!! Now, I will live in fear every time I see one. bahahahaha
So glad you decided to post this.. then as I was reading this I read this line:
"Don't point out that I am giving it to my husband's employees and parents though. I mean, I wish them no harm"
And I thought to myself "I mean, I wish them no HAM" hahahahaha!!!!!!! I am so hilarious!!! Don't you agree?!
Oh my word. I didn't even think that was possible. I will never look at a roaster the same way. Stick with crock pots - they are a safer choice for you! :)
Oh goodness. I am glad you are okay and I thank you for sharing that. Btw, I love to cook and have never used one of those either.
I'm sorry that my laughter comes at the expense of your "girls". Funny story though - I'm glad you shared it!
HAHAHAHAHA!! Sorry, but you seriously just MADE. MY. DAY.
Classic! I know it's embarrassing, but I'm so glad you shared. :)
Oh my gosh! You are just like me! I'm so clueless in the kitchen. I thought a neti pot was the new way to call crock pot!
I hope for my sake that I'm laughing with you and not at you. I wish you lived next door. I would totally cook your ham for you.
i <3 you. you make me smile!
i hope the girls are better today. :)
NO WAY! And I hadn't heard the ER horror stories after Easter either...hmmm
BWAHAHA!!!!! I don't mean to laugh, but HAHAHA!!!!!! That is awesome. I swear, only you could do something like that. :)
Hahahaha! I don't blame you!
OMG! That is just too hilarious!! If that happened to me, I would give up cooking for good!
LOL! I'm sorry but that is hilarious!
I am now sweeping coffee from my lap top screen and it's all your fault!
B xx
LOL! I hope you're joking. Hilarious!
now you have an excuse not to cook dinner!!
Oh my gosh that is something I would so do. I am not a cook either.. I hope all is better today.. Have a great day..
That's way too much catastrophe for one person! Ouchie!
Bwhahahahahahaha! Are they healed yet?
Oh, that is just hilarious...and painful!!!
Now that is laugh out loud hilarious! But part of me is feeling for your pain (but only a little part). :)
I promise, I didn't laugh. I can't help that I smiled a bit while chewing on my lower lip to stifle the giggle, though. Ouch! That had to hurt. Glad you are better now. I expected you to say that the water got hot super fast and you were burned, so this is actually a lot better.
Just think, in a few years, you'll be getting mammograms and will be paying good money to have someone squish them like that.
Ow!
Oh, and also, there's this new thing called the internet where you can look up instructions and stuff that you don't know. You should try it:)
Bwahahaha!!!
I've always wanted to get one of those ovens for the holidays. Now that I know how dangerous they are I'll keep on making do without one.
Ouchie!!
That's why I hate cooking too. It's an evil practice!
Oh em gee! ouch!
LOL! Sorry, but it is funny!
Ouch! And what are the odds of that happening?!
Bwahahah...Sorry I have to laugh! The boob part of the story is hilarious and so is the fact that you don't know how to operate a roaster. LOL!
I'll make you feel better in regards to your boobies.
While shaving my armpits the other day, I "nicked" my right nipple with the razor while reaching for my right armpit. Had to wear a band aid for 2 days. Yep, and it's not like they stick out either. Sheesh...
Oh no! That sounds like something that would happen to me!
Oh NO! I would ditch it and opt for take-out instead. Much safer.
Oh this sounds...painful! If it's any consolation I have no clue what to do with a roasting pan or a ham. Or any type of meat for that matter!
I am still cringing!!
Owie owie!!
Oh hunny I'm sorry that I'm actually laughing my ass off!!! Also exactly the reason I don't cook!!! xx
Nooo! Oh my gosh! Ouch, but a great story! I don't cook at ALL so it sounds like something I would do!
lmao!! Ouchie!! Oh my gosh. Sorry, but that is just too damn funny. lol
You roasted your girls? You poor thing!
LOL OHHHH NOOOO I actually slapped my hand over my face while I was reading this!!
Hope the bits and pieces feel better today:)
PS You are fabulous:)
I can't begin to explain the pain you just shot through me! OUCH!
Gives mammograms a new spin, doesn't it?
I'm right there with ya sister....don't get me near anything with a heating mechanism in the kitchen. One word: disaster.
Wanted to let you know I left you something at: http://kristinfunston.com/blog/awards/
In case you're into that kind of blog-errific type stuff.
Have a fabulous Saturday! :-)
Ouch! I'd call it a day at the point.
I always prefer my ham with a side of boobs!
lol oh no!!! that was funny to read although I'm sure it didn't feel funny! I hope you're feeling better!
Oh girly! If that was me, I'd swear off ham forever! Cooking too.
Hope you're OK.
Oh man. I've had the exact same thing happen to my boobs.
just checking in.. Hello..
Helpful hint from Sara. LOL I'm telling you! There are so many unreported boobie accidents in the kitchen! Did you see I burned mine making popcorn? WTH?! LOL
LMAO!!! OMG, girl... I am SO SORRY to laugh at your pain, but you have to admit: it does make for a good story ;) Glad you are on the mend though!
ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch!
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