Statistically Speaking, as it Relates to Being a Spaz

I am not a huge statistic person. That is a lie. I love the thought of statistics. It makes my heart go bump bump bump to see a good graph (I get all warm and fuzzy inside) with it's numbers and percentages...ahhh.

However, I am a bit of a skeptic on studies with statistics. In order for me to believe a statistic, poll, percentage, I want to see the study. Did you stand in an aisle next to the peanut butter and ask those picking out peanut butter if they like peanut butter? Then say 100% of people polled like peanut butter? My favorites are when they poll 106.456 people and announce, "Polls show that 67% of Americans are in favor of (insert whatever here.)" Really? 106 people? What a great representation of all Americans.

(Of course, I do understand that there has to be a cut off, I mean, you cannot poll the entire United States on every issue, study, ect. I am just saying I would like to see how the size and scope of the study is determined, so I can make an informed opinion on it's validity.)

Uh, moving on. So, statistically speaking, my chances of being killed by an axemurderer* are low. (Fine, I couldn't even find a statistic on it.) I did find this bit of info:

There are no specific stats available for death by serial killer. However,the USA has 76% of the world's serial killers.

Nice. I declined to dig deeper into this statistic, as when I googled serialkillers, my anxiety levels soared.

(Yes, I sorta do have a point with all of this...wait...it's coming...) The other night, I heard a noise from the kitchen. At night. In the darkness. It was an intermittent sound, with no discernible pattern. After listening for a period of 5 minutes, I woke up Corey.

"Do you hear that sound? There is something in the kitchen."

"I hear nothing." Rolls over.

"Well, I do."

"Maybe we have a mouse." he replies.

"Uh, it that is a mouse making those sounds, we better make sure it isn't a giant mutant of some sort."

....nothing....

"You are really going to make me go out there and check it out by myself? Chancing a certain death by axe?"

....nothing....

Bravely, I take my iphone and a water bottle and head to the kitchen. Peeking around the corner I see... my cat, sitting on the table, dipping her paw into a glass of water Elijah left sitting on the table.

I rush back to bed and assure Corey I am still alive. He's all, "See? There was not axemurderer waiting to off you. Go to bed."

Now, statistically speaking, my chances of it being an axemurderer were low. However...as I tried to fall asleep, I couldn't help but wonder. If our chances of being offed by a serialkiller are low, doesn't each time we hear a strange noise-where it is NOT a killer- actually increase our odds that the next time it will be?

*Remember? I now put axemurderer and serialkiller as one word, believing this will help save me from having them google their name and find my blog.