I am {not} guilty of hitting MckMama's blog about a million times this week, checking in on McMuffin. By Wednesday, my oldest {did not} ask me, "Mom, why are you always looking at the page with the Christmas picture?"
My husband? Yeah, he's great. But not that great when picking things up at the grocery store. So when he stopped there this last week to get a few things, I sent a reminder that I needed bread. He soon texted back, "What?" Umm, bread, my dear. Turns out I had {not} payed close attention to what I was texting. The text I sent him {did not} say, "I need breasts."
Can you grab those for me too, hon?
I {did not} eat a Hershey Kiss (Cheesecake!!) and when my 2 year old asked what mommy was eating say, "Mommy's medicine honey. It's yucky" so I wouldn't have to share.
At our Christmas get together the other night, my mom and grandma were curious about facebook, so I took them on. I however, {am not} responsible for the almost heart attack my grandma had upon seeing pics of my cousin faux lesbian kissing (she has a boyfriend), my other cousins drinking and partying and all the rest. Seriously, I did not (really) put those pics on. If they don't want them seen, don't post them, right? I sincerely hope Grandma has recovered.
Finally, tonight I bought a new mop. Not just a mop, a Magic Eraser mop. It {is not} magic ladies. My husband came into the kitchen and complimented me on my cleaning job. I {did not} say, "thanks hon, I worked really hard on this." That is, if mopping for 8 minutes, perusing Facebook and reading blogs is working hard.
So, now I am off to read yours... I love hearing what you all {did not} do...
46 comments:
I might have to get me one of those mops!
I'm cracking up! The breasts text was hilarious!! I've never done the "this is mommy medicine" thing either:) Great Not me! Thanks for sharing!
So funny, I love the "mommy medicine"! Love your Not Me's!
OMGosh the Facebook and breasts one were hilarious!
Yeah... I'm thinking my husband's mother shouldn't see that "horn-y" picture anytime soon!
Can your husband pick me up some breasts...I mean bread, too?
Funny, Funny post!
i enjoyed oyur Not Me's and your blog is super cute
I could use some fresh breasts...er I mean bread too. Funny post.
a great blog I once told my nieces that they couldnt have any after 8 mints because they had to go to bed at half seven just so I could eat them all
Love your blog!
I read over your 100 things about you post and we have a lot in common.
Your sons are ADORABLE! I have a blondie one too! AND I always tell him that I am eating something yucky! ;)
Thanks for sharing your NOT ME MONDAY posts...maybe one day I will be brave and post my own...
~ Bobbi :)
Oh yeah, I NEVER do that chocolate thing either... ; )
I'm new to Not Me Monday and your blog. It's very cute!
Hope your Grandmother is okay now...
Great not-me's! I never make excuses not to share...really I usually just hide :)
...and I LOVE the Wal-mart bingo! I just sat and laughed thinking BINGO!!!! cause' that's just what I see at my Wal-Mart!
Have a great week!
You weren't lying, cheesecake is medicine. Don't feel any guilt over that statement.
I love your list!
Any cheesecake sounds like medicine to me! :) I will have to get one of those eraser mops! Any shortcuts are wonderful! (Oh, and I was on MckMama's blog all week too! So glad he is doing better!)
OMG I SERIOUSLY need a good mop! Now I forgot all my comments I was GONNA say because I can't stop thinking about that MOP! LOL
You probably fulfilled a secret fantasy of your hubby's with that text! And I read the post below and also missed Target. Sad when you miss a place and not a person- but hey- it's awesome there LOL
Hilarious! Typing breasts instead of bread....priceless! Hope your grandma recovers from her almost heart attack...;-)
Your blog is cute! Did you enjoy your disney cruise, and was there enough for both adults and kids to do? We went to disney last year and the kids loved it would love to do the disney cruise next year. Congratulations on running, my husband also runs marathons,chicago is on the list this year! Makes it fun for me, all the great places we have visited because of marathons! Good luck!
I need one of those mops and My hubby would have replied back to that text with, whats wrong with the 2 you currently have? lol
I might have to use the mommy medicine line. usually i just tell them they wouldn't like it but sometimes they want to try it anyway - sharing, who needs it?
I love it! Especially the Facebook part. I absolutely refuse to show my parents how to use it..it would be way too sad when I had to refuse their friend request! Thanks for checking out my blog :)
Just found your blog! I love not me monday! Yours were too funny--the breasts/bread mishap was hysterical.
Great Not Me's! I most certainly do not lie about the treats I am eating (or eat them in hiding) so I don't have to share with my kids!
I love the breasts text...too funny!
Funny - and I did not once attempt to write "dill pickles" on a shopping list and get a call 40 minutes later from a frustrated husband, wanting to know what a "dickle" is.
You are just a hoot!!!
Very funny Not Me's! I love the texting "breasts". My husband would probably love it if I texted that :) Also, the "mommy medicine". I have done something similar with soda. My kids don't drink it and we tell them it is for grown ups. One day my 5 year old asked when he could drink soda and I told him he had to be 21.
I saw your tweet in your sidebar about moms being excited about school starting back and no sympathy for teachers...I taught first grade for 7 years before I took some time off to have my 3rd and stay home. I am currently on my 2nd year at home with hopefully 1 more to go. BELIEVE me, I do feel for you! I am excited about my kids going back, not to get them out of my hair and into the teacher's hair, but so they can play with their friends again...seems Mommy isn't as much in big doses :) Good luck to you as you head back to the classroom. Sorry this comment is so long...teachers like to talk :)
Ok seriously I magic eraser mop????? that sounds too good to be true!!!!!
and lol at the kisses but at 5 and 6 I so couldn't get away with that. I've tried lying and they just ask, how come you smell like chocolate then?
Enjoyed your Not Me's too. Thanks for stopping by my blog. The jumping pics were FUN to do!
I agree with your twitter post. What about the teachers? My kiddies were in rare form today (hs) and I have to wonder why they didn't spend some energy in the 16 day break instead of saving it for class...
Saw your comment and headed right over. My sister can not stand that lady who judges the contest...she had lots to say about her during the show! Hope you had a great monday and momma's medicine cracks me up!
~Elyse~
I love it. I'm always telling my kids "that's mommy's icky drink, honey" and make the sounds "ack, icky, yucky!!" to go along with it. It's starting to lose its effectiveness on my son but my daughter still buys it.
I wish my kids still fell for things being my medicine, LOL! Uhm I think I need a magic mop,ya know the kind you don't have to push ;)!
I have never visited your site before until today but I laughed so hard over the Hershey kiss that I was crying!! I have so been there, loved it~ Will be checking out your blog again! Take care!
I was so excited to see your comment on my blog! I just recently started my blog and you're my first official comment : ) Yay!
On another note, I'm also a teacher, used to run mini-marathons B.C. (before child), would go to Target each and every day if I didn't have to work in order to get money to go to Target, and absolutely loathe Wal-Mart. Nice to meet you!
Your boys are adorable.
That is a great list...I have NOT used that medicine line before too!
The one about bread is too funny. The problem with buying breasts at the grocery store is that they would probably sell them in sets of 3. It's like the hot dog/hot dog bun ratio problem... :)
I really enjoyed your writing...I'll be back!
I loved the text to your hubby, hehehehe!
I love the "breasts" text message that was hilarious! I think I have been known to send quick text messages before without checking what I type and ended up saying something I didn't mean to...
You commented on my post and I wasn't sure if I should comment back here or there so I'm just doing it here... just wanted to say that you definitely need to get a Wii Fit... they are so much fun. I hate to exercise but with Wii Fit I actually want to get on it every night. I have already seen improvements and I really enjoy doing it! I think its worth the money by far! Thanks for commenting!
I read your posts and they all felt familiar and were so funny! My friends tease me all the time for using predicitve spelling in my text messages! It doesnt alway turn out the way you planned!
Funny funny post!
~Sarah
oh. my. gosh.
the story about your Grandma is cracking me up!!!
Loved this post! Wouldn't it be great if we really could pick up breasts (for us) at the store!
I think the whole world was waiting on McMuffin. I at least told 10 strangers about him :-)
So those mops are pretty nifty huh? I hemmed and hawed over one the other day. I'll have to go pick one up now. Thanks!
You NMN post on text messaging was hilarious! And mommy's medicine is PERFECT! Gonna have to use that one.
We all need a little "mommy medicine" once in awhile, especially when it comes in the form of Hershey Kisses and/or cheesecake!
Enjoyed all your NMNs! I like your blog too- the Walmart bingo...hahaha!! I'll be visiting again!
Too funny...breasts....too bad you can't get them at the grocery store.
Love your Not Me's! I have totally told my kids that the wicked treat I'm eating is yucky. :) My kids have also asked me "Do you even KNOW those people you look at all the time?"
I have been WANTING one of those mops! So it works??? I think I'm gonna suck it up and just get one.
That text msg was hilarious!
What's a mop? I am not sure I have mopped in ages!! I run the Swiffer Wet Jet around about once a week...does that count? Maybe I should look into the Magic Eraser mop.
Love the Not Me's!
Post a Comment