- Two days a week, I work from an office at our district's high school
- I recently turned 34, and have noticed that I am no longer a spring chicken
- I decided to take a walk down the high school halls and gather data to use in order to make myself "hip to the hop" with the younger crowd (and seriously, that is not a small task, I am 62.25 inches tall and these kids are GIANTS. It's scary out in those halls.
Unnecessary but nonetheless interesting information:
- The office used to be a police liaison office, so I am pretty sure that makes me [thisclose] to being a police liaison myself.
- Also, because there is a police presence 'round here, I have had the opportunity to get to know our friendly neighborhood officers and just today gave them the make and model of my vehicle, so they can be sure NOT to pull me over. I explained to them that I cannot maintain my lane, will always slam on my brakes when I see them, and will be singing loudly as I drive. They seemed to take this information seriously.
By the way? Anyone else get really irritated with bloggers formatting? So annoying.
So, the results of my research are in, are HERE are the TOP 5 ways to embrace the practices of our youth and be hip:
1) Always, ALWAYS have earbuds with you, but ONLY have one in your ear at all times. Having both in is dorky, the second one needs to be dangling there like a pesky fly, but never actually used.
- It does not appear that the actual ear the earbud is placed in is a big deal, but I will be conducting further research in case I just wasn't paying all that much attention
2) Leggings are, in fact, pants. Women, wear 'em. All colors, the more patterns the better. Tops must be hip length or shorter, this is non-negotiable.
(but I am sorry, I refuse to wear pleather boots. I have to draw the line somewhere. Our youth can get away with this because of their young age and lack of income, but I have no excuse)
3) Never walk down the hall without a smartphone in your hand. Ever.
4) Don't move out of the way for anyone, ever. Even if it is a poor, innocent woman just trying to get to her destination unharmed, do not move. It shows your power as the next ruling generation to make these people alter their paths for you. Remember- this is Gen Y! They should know better than to even THINK you'd move for them. And when the short, feisty one does not move? Act like it was the biggest inconvenience, like, ever to move for her.
5) Bedazzle yourself. If it has sparkles? Wear it. If it doesn't? Add 'em. How else does one expect to be noticed in this overpopulated world? Stand out! Bedazzle yourself- don't let the others have more sequins than you.
Conclusion:
See? It's not that hard. I was worried that I'd lost my youthful edge, but I can handle these. (and if you are under 19 and reading this? Please don't burst my bubble and tell me I have it all wrong, I need to believe I am hip.)
Sara
10 comments:
Your high school sounds very similar to mine. I avoid passing time at all cost as I'm about .25 inches shorter than you and those giants scare me.
I work at the high school almost every day and you are pretty spot on with your research.
I have been knocked sideways because some just could.not.move. out of the way.
The one earbud thing is so that they can talk and listen to their music at the same time. And if I can hear their music through that dangling bud I threaten to make EVERYONE put their music up.
The leggings and short shirts drives me nuts. Some of the girls can get away with it, but some girls just don't have the bodies for it. Regardless though, I don't need to know what any of those girls look like naked. Which is exactly what I know because of those leggings. And the teenage boys? They REALLY don't need to know.
Miss Me jeans are so popular and sometimes I need my sunglasses on in the hallway so I'm not blinded by the florescent lights bouncing off the girls' bling.
$5 gets pricy if you get caught with a smartphone in your hand. They keep those babies in their back pockets until they're in the classroom and their face is all aglow while staring at their crotch.
I work at the high school almost every day and you are pretty spot on with your research.
I have been knocked sideways because some just could.not.move. out of the way.
The one earbud thing is so that they can talk and listen to their music at the same time. And if I can hear their music through that dangling bud I threaten to make EVERYONE put their music up.
The leggings and short shirts drives me nuts. Some of the girls can get away with it, but some girls just don't have the bodies for it. Regardless though, I don't need to know what any of those girls look like naked. Which is exactly what I know because of those leggings. And the teenage boys? They REALLY don't need to know.
Miss Me jeans are so popular and sometimes I need my sunglasses on in the hallway so I'm not blinded by the florescent lights bouncing off the girls' bling.
$5 gets pricy if you get caught with a smartphone in your hand. They keep those babies in their back pockets until they're in the classroom and their face is all aglow while staring at their crotch.
Gah! Can't believe how much schools have changed...am I really that old. Yes, yes I am.
Bahaha - the police thing cracked me up!
It's probably been a little bit since you've stepped foot on a college campus, but I'll tell you that as a graduate student, not much as changed in the points you've made. The biggest difference? It's buds in 2 ears at all times. You do not want people to think you're open for conversation. Duh.
LOVE this post! You are much more brave than I am to wander the halls of high school :) Oh but I guess i am pretty cool, as the ear bud thing I totally do that when I am go running.... it is more out of paranoia of someone sneaking up behind me than being cool though
Eek, I think high school would scare me now. Kids seem ruder these days.
I can't even imagine working in a high school. Give me a room full of crazy 2 year olds instead!!!
Oh my gosh, the leggings. My 13 yr old niece is all about leggings as pants. Sweatshirt? Tuck it in. Tuck everything in. No matter what, make sure everyone can see your buns.
This generation is in full force at SCSU, minus the leggings as pants. But the do.not.move has been upped tenfold. I'm actually comforted to know it is generational. But I'm old enough to be a professor, so it still surprises me when they don't move.
Good news this is to everyone out there with different health challenges, as I know there are still a lot of people suffering from different health issues and are therefore looking for solutions. I bring you Good news. There is a man called Dr Itua herbal practitioner who helped cure me from HSV (2). I have suffered from this disease for the past 5 years and I have spent so much money trying to survive from it. I got my healing by taking the herbal medicine Dr Itua sent to me to drink for about 14 days . 3 days after completion of the dosage, I went for a medical checkup and I was tested free from HSV. All thanks to God for leading me to Dr Itua who was able to cure me completely from this deadly disease. I’m sharing this so that other people can know of this great healer called Dr Itua because I got to know him through Elizabeth who he cured from HPV . I was made to understand that he can cure several other deadly diseases and infections. Don’t die in ignorance or silence and don’t let that illness take your life. Contact Dr Itua through his email (drituaherbalcenter@gmail.com) You can also order from his webstore https://drituaherbalcenter.com/shop/. He cure all forms of disease {1}HIV/AIDS {2}DIABETES {3}EPILEPSY {4} BLOOD CANCER {5} HPV {6} BRAIN TUMOR {7} HEPATITIS {8}COPD{9} SICKLE AND ANAEMIA.etc Be kind enough to share as you received
Post a Comment